29 Mar 2015

A tribute to My Father - This month, 10 years of my life without my dad!

When I visited my father in December of 2004 in Casablanca, he was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. He was weak, very jaundice with skin and whites of eyes were yellow as well.  I was so shocked by his appearance that I started crying as I hugged him. I sat down next to him with my face buried in his shoulders as I cried my eyes out.  I could feel his weak hands, touching my hair, and rubbing my back, whispering to me out of the side of his mouth in the way he always did : “Matbkich abnti, rani bikhir", which means: “My daughter, please don't cry, I am fine”.

At that stage of cancer, my dad was having severe pain and no medicine would work on. He tried hydromorphone which stopped working, then was switched to oxycontin or oxycodone ..... I can't remember all the names of pain killers they put him on.  He stopped eating or refused to or maybe both, then we were informed that he had only three months to live, and prepare ourselves for the worst. The world stopped turning!

My dad was the most loving, caring and generous man. I've been proud of him for my whole life, a real gentleman. I never heard him shouting, screaming or losing his temper. He was a very clever, thoughtful man of few words and deep thoughts.  He would never talk about something only for the love of talk, but his words had to hit the point, otherwise he wouldn't say anything. Thank you mum for having great taste and choosing such a wonderful, special and unique dad for your children and a good hard-working husband who respected, loved and treated you so well.

I love you dad but Allah loves you more, you worked hard for your family and your departure was and still is a great loss. You will always be remembered fondly.  May Allah grant you peaceful and eternal rest. Amine!
Mamatkamal
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